Protecting Sexual Predators- R. Kelly’s Newest Allegations Highlight Black America’s Dirty Little Secret


By Yolanda Spivey

This is hard for me to write, but growing up, I was a victim of child molestation. The perpetrator who violated me was a man of means, and when he was finally exposed for violating me, nothing happened. Not a damn thing. The adult family members neither comforted the hurt little girl nor was I asked if I were okay. They just went on with life as normal. I later learned that their silence had been bought—this man was giving them money on occasion and paying their bills. Making matters worse, they generally just liked him. To them, he was a great guy; to me, he was a vile ass creep who took away my innocence and caused damage that took 10 years of my life to repair.

Money equals POWER!

R. Kelly reminds me of that predator. He’s loved and adored by millions of people. His music is catchy and hypnotizing. He’s a genius to some. And all of that crushes the fact that he is an alleged sexual predator who has been violating young girls for over two decades. I won’t get into all of his cases and nor will I make this article solely about R. Kelly, but when I first heard about his marriage to Aaliyah, who was only 15 years old back in 1994, that immediately led to me boycotting R. Kelly’s music and other projects. And years later, a tape surfaced of him urinating on a young girl which led him to being dragged in court where he was charged with MANUFACTURING CHILD PORNOGRAPHY. He was never charged with child rape which eventually led to him being found not guilty of the charges. Let’s not even talk about how he dubbed himself the Pied Piper immediately after and on subsequent records. It was as if he was taunting those who were against him and letting them know that he won AGAIN.

The newest allegations against Kelly once again have Black people on different sides of the fence when it comes to rape and the exploitation of Black women. Various news outlets are reporting that Kelly is holding a few women in his homes in a cult like setting. According to family members of the victims, they have hardly any communication with these young ladies. One young lady, who was once part of this haram, stated that she had her phone taken away from her and was occasionally starved if she did something Kelly didn’t like. The girls are allegedly forced to be separate unless they are having intercourse with each other.

The worst thing about these accusations is the fact that these young ladies’ parents are throwing their children towards R. Kelly under the notion that he’s going to make their children famous. But at what price?

This article is for my brother and sisters.

The incident that happened to me and R. Kelly’s reported victims are far too common in the Black community. I’ve met countless people, both male and female, who were also violated by family members and close family friends and nothing ever happened to the perpetrators. Family members would often not punish these individuals and allow them to stay in their homes. The victim would have to look at these disgusting beings for years to come as the family gathered for holiday and other life events. It’s as if nothing ever happened. The perps are then left to violate others because no one is calling them out on their bad behavior. They also are not reported to law enforcement.

I think that as Black people, we’ve become immune to these types of situations. I can see clearly by the way we treat R. Kelly. On various social media outlets, I see some comparing him to Hugh Hefner, the founder of Playboy. The difference there is that the women at Hefner’s iconic Playboy mansion have free will to come and go as they please. Further, they get paid to be there. If they play their cards right, they can virtually capitalize off of that degrading experience.

Not in R. Kelly’s home though.

What was also disturbing was the fact that so many young men were calling these girls hoes and THOTs. They clearly aren’t looking on the other side of this situation and realizing that these young women might be the victims of abuse and exploitation. They also see nothing wrong with R. Kelly sleeping with young girls. It gets me to thinking: Would they do it too or have they done it already?

Young girls and grown ass women too are defending Kelly with statements like “the girls are doing what they want to do.” Or, “they are fast asses.” Some of the women defending the behavior are victims of sexual abuse as well.

Empty shells– No empathy.

The bodies of Black children and women are not protected, not even within our communities. We’ve all heard the stories about the sexual abuse that Black women, in particular, suffered during slavery times by the hands of white men. After slavery, white men actually made laws to continue to rape Black women. (Please research Paramour Rights).

It seems as if Black men have picked up where white men left off. And in some cases, Black women are also the perpetrators.

My question to us is: “When are we going to stop this shit?”

Sexual abuse is literally ruining our communities. It’s creating monsters. Your child can literally go visit a friend or family member and come back a changed individual because, in a split second, someone has damaged them.

Sexual abuse creates criminals because often times when children are abused, they either become abusers themselves or go down a dark path that is inflicted with drugs and prostitution. That, in turn, can lead them to being put in jail/ prison, or worse. . .death.

Sexual abuse creates murderers. I’ll never forget watching the case of a woman named Mitchell Blair from Detroit Michigan. Blair was accused of killing her teenage daughter and pre-teen son because they allegedly raped their younger sibling. Blair, who was overcome with anger, killed

them both and placed their bodies in a deep freezer. When she was finally found out about, she said that she would do it again if given the opportunity. She too was a victim of childhood sexual abuse, but her dead children probably were too if the allegations of them violating their younger sibling are true.

We only pay attention to the aftermath of what these violations are causing in our communities and we are not proactive in stopping this from reoccurring in the first place.

My remedy. . .

Abusers need to be held accountable and the Black community needs to stand the fuck up and start protecting our own.

Yolanda Spivey writes on a variety of topics and is the founder of Black Insurance News. She can be reached at or you can visit her Facebook page.

One Response to Protecting Sexual Predators- R. Kelly’s Newest Allegations Highlight Black America’s Dirty Little Secret

  1. Jolenne Stewart says:

    I’m so so sorry you have been hurt. I have been also and understand. I pray God helps you to love and trust again.

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